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'This man you call Gordon, I thought he had a profitable business out there as it is,' Mr Hoddy said. 'Why does he want to change?'

  'Absolutely right, Mr Hoddy. It's a first-rate business. But it's a good thing to keep expanding, see. New ideas is what we're after. Something I can come in on as well and take a share of the profits.'

  'Such as what?'

  Mr Hoddy was eating a slice of currant cake, nibbling it round the edges, and his small mouth was like the mouth of a caterpillar biting a tiny curved slice out of the edge of a leaf.

  'Such as what?' he asked again.

  'There's long conferences, Mr Hoddy, takes place every day between Gordon and me about these different matters of business.'

  'Such as what?' he repeated, relentless.

  Clarice glanced sideways at Claud, encouraging. Claud turned his large slow eyes upon Mr Hoddy, and he was silent. He wished Mr Hoddy wouldn't push him around like this, always shooting questions at him and glaring at him and acting just exactly like he was the bloody adjutant or something.

  'Such as what?' Mr Hoddy said, and this time Claud knew that he was not going to let go. Also, his instinct warned him that the old man was trying to create a crisis.

  'Well now,' he said, breathing deep. 'I don't really want to go into details until we got it properly worked out. All we're doing so far is turning our ideas over in our minds, see.'

  'All I'm asking,' Mr Hoddy said irritably, 'is what sort of business are you contemplating? I presume that it's respectable?'

  'Now please, Mr Hoddy. You don't for one moment think we'd even so much as consider anything that wasn't absolutely and entirely respectable, do you?'

  Mr Hoddy grunted, stirring his tea slowly, watching Claud. Clarice sat mute and fearful on the sofa, gazing into the fire.

  'I've never been in favour of starting a business,' Mr Hoddy pronounced, defending his own failure in that line. 'A good respectable job is all a man should wish for. A respectable job in respectable surroundings. Too much hokey-pokey in business for my liking.'

  'The thing is this,' Claud said, desperate now. 'All I want is to provide my wife with everything she can possibly desire. A house to live in and furniture and a flower-garden and a washing-machine and all the best things in the world. That's what I want to do, and you can't do that on an ordinary wage, now can you? It's impossible to get enough money to do that unless you go into business, Mr Hoddy. You'll surely agree with me there?'

  Mr Hoddy, who had worked for an ordinary wage all his life, didn't much like this point of view.

  'And don't you think I provide everything my family wants, might I ask?'

  'Oh yes and more!' Claud cried fervently. 'But you've got a very superior job, Mr Hoddy, and that makes all the difference.'

  'But what sort of business are you thinking of?' the man persisted.

  Claud sipped his tea to give himself a little more time and he couldn't help wondering how the miserable old bastard's face would look if he simply up and told him the truth right there and then, if he'd said what we've got, Mr Hoddy, if you really want to know, is a couple of greyhounds and one's a perfect ringer for the other and we're going to bring off the biggest goddam gamble in the history of flapping, see. He'd like to watch the old bastard's face if he said that, he really would.

  They were all waiting for him to proceed now, sitting there with cups of tea in their hands staring at him and waiting for him to say something good. 'Well,' he said, speaking very slowly because he was thinking deep. 'I've been pondering something a long time now, something as'll make more money even than Gordon's second-hand cars or anything else come to that, and practically no expense involved.' That's better, he told himself. Keep going along like that.

  'And what might that be?'

  'Something so queer, Mr Hoddy, there isn't one in a million would even believe it.'

  "Well, what is it?' Mr Hoddy placed his cup carefully on the little table beside him and leaned forward to listen. And Claud, watching him, knew more than ever that this man and all those like him were his enemies. It was the Mr Hoddys were the trouble. They were all the same. He knew them all, with their clean ugly hands, their grey skin, their acrid mouths, their tendency to develop little round bulging bellies just below the waistcoat; and always the unctuous curl of the nose, the weak chin, the suspicious eyes that were dark and moved too quick. The Mr Hoddys. Oh Christ.

  'Well, what is it?'

  'It's an absolute gold-mine Mr Hoddy, honestly it is.'

  'I'll believe that when I hear it.'

  'It's a thing so simple and amazing most people wouldn't even bother to do it.' He had it now - something he had actually been thinking seriously about for a long time, something he'd always wanted to do. He leaned across and put his tea-cup carefully on the table beside Mr Hoddy's, then, not knowing what to do with his hands, placed them on his knees, palms downward.

  'Well, come on, man, what is it?"

  'It's maggots,' Claud answered softly.

  Mr Hoddy jerked back as though someone had squirted water in his face. 'Maggots!' he said, aghast. 'Maggots? What on earth do you mean, maggots?' Claud had forgotten that this word was almost unmentionable in any self-respecting grocer's shop. Ada began to giggle, but Clarice glanced at her so malignantly the giggle died on her mouth.

  'That's where the money is, starting a maggot-factory.'

  'Are you trying to be funny?"

  'Honestly, Mr Hoddy, it may sound a bit queer, and that's simply because you never heard of it before, but it's a little gold-mine.'

  'A maggot-factory! Really now, Cubbage! Please be sensible!'

  Clarice wished her father wouldn't call him Cubbage.

  'You never heard speak of a maggot-factory, Mr Hoddy?'

  'I certainly have not!'

  'There's maggot-factories going now, real big companies with managers and directors and all, and you know what, Mr Hoddy? They're making millions!'

  'Nonsense, man.'

  'And you know why they're making millions?' Claud paused, but he did not notice now that his listener's face was slowly turning yellow. 'It's because of the enormous demand for maggots, Mr Hoddy.'

  At that moment, Mr Hoddy was listening also to other voices, the voices of his customers across the counter - Mrs Rabbits for instance, as he sliced off her ration of butter, Mrs Rabbits with her brown moustache and always talking so loud and saying well well well; he could hear her now saying well well well Mr Hoddy, so your Clarice got married last week, did she. Very nice too, I must say, and what was it you said her husband does, Mr Hoddy?

  He owns a maggot-factory, Mrs Rabbits.

  No thank you, he told himself, watching Claud with his small, hostile eyes. No thank you very much indeed. I don't want that.

  'I can't say,' he announced primly, 'that I myself have ever had occasion to purchase a maggot.'

  'Now you come to mention it, Mr Hoddy, nor have I. Nor has many other people we know. But let me ask you something else. How many times you had occasion to purchase ... a crown wheel and pinion, for instance?'

  This was a shrewd question and Claud permitted himself a slow mawkish smile.

  'What's that got to do with maggots?'

  'Exactly this - that certain people buy certain things, see. You never bought a crown wheel and pinion in your life, but that don't say there isn't men getting rich this very moment making them - because there is. It's the same with maggots!'

  'Would you mind telling me who these unpleasant people are who buy maggots?'

  'Maggots are bought by fishermen, Mr Hoddy. Amateur fishermen. There's thousands and thousands of fishermen all over the country going out every weekend fishing the rivers and all of them wanting maggots. Willing to pay good money for them, too. You go along the river there anywhere you like above Marlow on a Sunday and you'll see them lining the banks. Sitting there one beside the other simply lining the banks on both sides.'

  'Those men don't buy maggots. They go down the bottom of the garden and dig worms.'


  'Now that's just where you're wrong, Mr Hoddy, if you'll allow me to say so. That's just where you're absolutely wrong. They want maggots, not worms.'

  'In that case they get their own maggots.'

  'They don't want to get their own maggots. Just imagine, Mr Hoddy, it's Saturday afternoon and you're going out fishing and a nice clean tin of maggots arrives by post and all you've got to do is slip it in the fishing bag and away you go. You don't think fellers is going out digging for worms and hunting for maggots when they can have them delivered right to their very doorsteps like that just for a bob or two, do you?'

  'And might I ask how you propose to run this maggot-factory of yours?' When he spoke the word maggot, it seemed as if he were spitting out a sour little pip from his mouth.

  'Easiest thing in the world to run a maggot-factory.' Claud was gaining confidence now and warming to his subject. 'All you need is a couple of old oil drums and a few lumps of rotten meat or a sheep's head, and you put them in the oil drums and that's all you do. The flies do the rest.'

  Had he been watching Mr Hoddy's face he would probably have stopped there.

  'Of course, it's not quite as easy as it sounds. What you've got to do next is feed up your maggots with special diet. Bran and milk. And then when they get big and fat you put them in pint tins and post them off to your customers. Five shillings a pint they fetch. Five shillings a pint!' he cried, slapping his knee. 'You just imagine that, Mr Hoddy! And they say one bluebottle'll lay twenty pints easy!'

  He paused again, but merely to marshal his thoughts, for there was no stopping him now.

  'And there's another thing, Mr Hoddy. A good maggot-factory don't just breed ordinary maggots, you know. Every fisherman's got his own tastes. Maggots are commonest, but also there's lug worms. Some fishermen won't have nothing but lug worms. And of course there's coloured maggots. Ordinary maggots are white, but you get them all sorts of different colours by feeding them special foods, see. Red ones and green ones and black ones and you can even get blue ones if you know what to feed them. The most difficult thing of all in a maggot-factory is a blue maggot, Mr Hoddy.'

  Claud stopped to catch his breath. He was having a vision now - the same vision that accompanied all his dreams of wealth - of an immense factory building with tall chimneys and hundreds of happy workers streaming in through the wide wrought-iron gates and Claud himself sitting in his luxurious office directing operations with a calm and splendid assurance.

  'There's people with brains studying these things this very minute,' he went on. 'So you got to jump in quick unless you want to get left out in the cold. That's the secret of big business, jumping in quick before all the others, Mr Hoddy.'

  Clarice, Ada, and the father sat absolutely still looking straight ahead. None of them moved or spoke. Only Claud rushed on.

  'Just so long as you make sure your maggots is alive when you post em. They've got to be wiggling, see. Maggots is no good unless they're wiggling. And when we really get going, when we've built up a little capital, then we'll put up some glasshouses.'

  Another pause, and Claud stroked his chin. 'Now I expect you're all wondering why a person should want glasshouses in a maggot-factory. Well - I'll tell you. It's for the flies in the winter.'

  'I think that's enough, thank you, Cubbage,' Mr Hoddy said suddenly.

  Claud looked up and for the first time he saw the expression on the man's face. It stopped him cold.

  'I don't want to hear any more about it,' Mr Hoddy said.

  'All I'm trying to do, Mr Hoddy,' Claud cried, 'is give your little girl everything she can possibly desire. That's all I'm thinking of night and day, Mr Hoddy.'

  'Then all I hope is you'll be able to do it without the help of maggots.'

  'Dad!' Clarice cried, alarmed. 'I simply won't have you talking to Claud like that.'

  'I'll talk to him how I wish, thank you, miss.'

  'I think it's time I was getting along,' Claud said. 'Good night.'

  Mr Feasey [1953]

  We were both up early when the big day came.

  I wandered into the kitchen for a shave but Claud got dressed right away and went outside to arrange about the straw. The kitchen was a front room and through the window I could see the sun just coming up behind the line of trees on top of the ridge the other side of the valley.

  Each time Claud came past the window with an armload of straw I noticed over the rim of the mirror the intent, breathless expression on his face, the great round bullet-head thrusting forward and the forehead wrinkled into deep corrugations right up to the hairline. I'd only seen this look on him once before and that was the evening he'd asked Clarice to marry him. Today he was so excited he even walked funny, treading softly as though the concrete round the filling-station were a shade too hot for the soles of his feet; and he kept packing more and more straw into the back of the van to make it comfortable for Jackie.

  Then he came into the kitchen to fix breakfast, and I watched him put the pot of soup on the stove and begin stirring it. He had a long metal spoon and he kept on stirring and stirring all the time it was coming to the boil, and about every half minute he leaned forward and stuck his nose into that sickly-sweet steam of cooking horse-flesh. Then he started putting extras into it - three peeled onions, a few young carrots, a cupful of stinging-nettle tops, a teaspoon of Valentine's Meatjuice, twelve drops of codliver oil - and everything he touched was handled very gently with the ends of his big fat fingers as though it might have been a little fragment of Venetian glass. He took some minced horsemeat from the icebox, measured one handful into Jackie's bowl, three into the other, and when the soup was ready he shared it out between the two, pouring it over the meat.

  It was the same ceremony I'd seen performed each morning for the past five months, but never with such intense and breathless concentration as this. There was no talk, not even a glance my way, and when he turned and went out again to fetch the dogs, even the back of his neck and the shoulders seemed to be whispering, 'Oh Jesus, don't let anything go wrong, and especially don't let me do anything wrong today.'

  I heard him talking softly to the dogs in the pen as he put the leashes on them, and when he brought them round into the kitchen, they came in prancing and pulling to get at the breakfast, treading up and down with their front feet and waving their enormous tails from side to side, like whips.

  'All right,' Claud said, speaking at last. 'Which is it?'

  Most mornings he'd offer to bet me a pack of cigarettes, but there were bigger things at stake today and I knew all he wanted for the moment was a little extra reassurance.

  He watched me as I walked once round the two beautiful, identical, tall, velvety-black dogs, and he moved aside, holding the leashes at arm's length to give me a better view.

  'Jackie!' I said, trying the old trick that never worked. 'Hey Jackie!' Two identical heads with identical expressions flicked round to look at me, four bright, identical, deep-yellow eyes stared into mine. There'd been a time when I fancied the eyes of one were a slightly darker yellow than those of the other. There'd also been a time when I thought I could recognize Jackie because of a deeper brisket and a shade more muscle on the hindquarters. But it wasn't so.

  'Come on,' Claud said. He was hoping that today of all days I would make a bad guess.

  'This one,' I said. 'This is Jackie.'

  'Which?'

  'This one on the left.'

  'There!' he cried, his whole face suddenly beaming. 'You're wrong again!'

  'I don't think I'm wrong.'

  'You're about as wrong as you could possibly be. And now listen, Gordon, and I'll tell you something. All these last weeks, every morning while you've been trying to pick him out - you know what?'

  'What?'

  'I've been keeping count. And the result is you haven't been right even one-half the time! You'd have done better tossing a coin!'

  What he meant was that if I (who saw them every day and side by side) couldn't do it, why the hell
should we be frightened of Mr Feasey. Claud knew Mr Feasey was famous for spotting ringers, but he knew also that it could be very difficult to tell the difference between two dogs when there wasn't any.

  He put the bowls of food on the floor, giving Jackie the one with the least meat because he was running today. When he stood back to watch them eat, the shadow of deep concern was back again on his face and the large pale eyes were staring at Jackie with the same rapt and melting look of love that up till recently had been reserved only for Clarice.

  'You see, Gordon,' he said. 'It's just what I've always told you. For the last hundred years there's been all manner of ringers, some good and some bad, but in the whole history of dog-racing there's never been a ringer like this.'

  'I hope you're right,' I said, and my mind began travelling back to that freezing afternoon just before Christmas, four months ago, when Claud had asked to borrow the van and had driven away in the direction of Aylesbury without saying where he was going. I had assumed he was off to see Clarice, but late in the afternoon he had returned bringing with him this dog he said he'd bought off a man for thirty-five shillings.

  'Is he fast?' I had said. We were standing out by the pumps and Claud was holding the dog on a leash and looking at him, and a few snowflakes were falling and settling on the dog's back. The motor of the van was still running.

  'Fast!' Claud had said. 'He's just about the slowest dog you ever saw in your whole life!'

  'Then what you buy him for?'

  'Well,' he had said, the big bovine face secret and cunning, 'it occurred to me that maybe he might possibly look a little bit like Jackie. What d'you think?'

  'I suppose he does a bit, now you come to mention it.'

  He had handed me the leash and I had taken the new dog inside to dry him off while Claud had gone round to the pen to fetch his beloved. And when he returned and we put the two of them together for the first time, I can remember his stepping back and saying, 'Oh, Jesus!' and standing dead still in front of them like he was seeing a phantom. Then he became very quick and quiet. He got down on his knees and began comparing them carefully point by point, and it was almost like the room was getting warmer and warmer the way I could feel his excitement growing every second through this long silent examination in which even the toenails and the dewclaws, eighteen on each dog, were matched alongside one another for colour.